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, by Lee Gutkind
Free Download , by Lee Gutkind
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Product details
File Size: 846 KB
Print Length: 288 pages
Publisher: In Fact Books; Original edition (April 10, 2012)
Publication Date: April 10, 2012
Sold by: Amazon Digital Services LLC
Language: English
ASIN: B007NK578A
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Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#148,382 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
Although the subject of death sounds so depressing, in fact these thoughtful and reflective memories around death were not distressing. I am currently grieving the death of my sister, and several essays in particular -- such as the frustration of dealing with nursing home staff -- mirrored my own experiences. Authors talked about the death of a particular person -- or in a few essays, a few individual deaths. Each author had a different relationship with the person who died. Some were medical professionals, some were family members, some were both. A son - himself a doctor - sits in a hospital room in Poland watching an American movie with his dying father. A mother makes the painful decision to donate her daughter's organs. An intern must turn off a ventilator so that a woman can die as she wished. I will remember the stories told in this book for a very long time.
As a educator, nurse, administrator, but more importantly, a sister, wife, mother and grandmother, this collection of personally witnessed deaths, both peaceful and traumatic, emphasizes my personal wishes for my end of life experience. As her power of attorney and witness to my mother's wishes for her death, I honored her desire to die in her bed, just she and I together. She quietly breathed away her last hours with only my touch and hushed words of encouragement and release. These essays served to reinforce those decisions made in clear minded, healthier times. I would recommend this book to anyone wrestling with their own mortality or that of a loved one.
Having experienced my husband’s long last illness and the wonderful care he received from Hospice, I read some of these stories with a sense of relief that we did not experience what so many elderly people have to endure at the end of life. To be old, poor and alone would seem a recipe for disaster. I think the various stories represent the spectrum of care quite well. I am just sad for those who didn’t have the opportunity to benefit from Hospice at home.
We don't pay much attention to end of life issues until we are faced with them. These stories are thoughtful reflections on experiences at end of life. These are not the recollections of folks who had near death events. Instead the stories are from the other side of the equation - those who were near someone's death event and have something worthy to speak about.
Not quite finished with this collection of essays. They really make you stop and think about what the heck you're doing when you're trying to care for someone whose life is ending. Some of the knee-jerk reactions, like not "giving up", prove to be deleterious to both caregiver and the person who is dying. Many essays note that pain relief should be primary in caring for these patients, and often it is not. Nursing homes, by and large, get a very bad rap (probably deservedly so) in general, despite the fact that some of the caretakers do really connect and care about their patients. All in all, a very sobering collection. Thoughtful, not a screed.
These stories help us understand something about death and how to face it with loved ones, and with strangers, and for ourselves. It isn't morbid -- it's life. It has a beginning, and it has an end. Always.
I've been a nurse for over 10 years now and I've seen my share of end of life issues. I wasn't sure what to expect from this book but I am pleased to say I really did enjoy it because the stories FELT so real. It's a collection of short stories of personal accounts and I felt my heart breaking while empathizing with each situation. Throughout the book I couldn't help but think, "What would I do if this was happening to me?" It made me reflect again on the relationships I have and how I should take advantage of every opportunity to enjoy the little things since life can be so fleeting. It's important to really think about death and how it impacts us and those around us. Unless it happens to us personally, sometimes we tend to easily forget that the grieving and mourning process goes well beyond the week of bereavement we are given off from work. We see people go back to their usual activities thinking they must be doing well but little do we realize that they are still dealing with emotional pain and anguish months or years after they've lost a love one. Our society seems to be preoccupied with so many other details that death is rarely given much thought until it personally touches us. Out of sight doesn't mean out of mind in this case. The more we can help each other understand and cope with it, the healthier we all can be mentally and emotionally. End of life decisions and situations are never easy but I would hope that we can all make the right decisions for ourselves and our loved ones when the time calls for it. I definitely would recommend this to anyone interested in broadening their perspective and appreciation for life. It's definitely worth the read.
I'm a hospice nurse so find myself reading a lot of books like this, maybe to find similar experiences, maybe to decide how I'll write about my life. This book has many different views of dying. I would recommend it for anyone about to lose a loved one.
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